I've had a roller coaster last few weeks, alternating between "fine, i'm done, moving onwardly" and "i hate where my life is going, can i please get off the ride now?". But one thing's for sure. She's in my dreams. All of them. She's the only thing my subconscious can think about. Which is weird. I've never had my subconscious so focused on something before.
I'm not saying I'm gonna sit around and whine for all eternity. I'm just saying that most of my sleeping is centered around dreams involving her: being with her, friends talking about her, people telling me what i should do to get her back. I dunno.
Life's taking me somewhere right now. And, no, I'm not going to question God's will, but I'm not sure where I'm headed. I just hope I'm headed back to where I once was.
Meanwhile, work alternates between good and sucky. Money generally rocks, but some of the people who work there kinda get on my nerves. Today we're having a Mock Inspection.. So I guess I have to do everything by the book.. Except that no one exactly trained me, so... lol I'll do the best I can.
Stuff with my friends alternates as well. Last night was fun, though. We played some Munchkin. I dunno when I'll see my friends again, though. I work a lot. Hopefully I can go to Mark's Halloween party. I have the perfect costume idea. Maybe not as awesome as Tony Stark, but still pretty cool.
So, all in all, everything in my life keeps swaying from good to bad and back.. I know I'll survive. I know that THIS is better than how things were a month or so ago.. But, I still think that we could be happy together, if we were ACTUALLY together. I still have hope. I'm just unsure of whether or not she'll grant me that one wish. Just try again.
Remember how much fun we had when we were together? Rock Band, the zoo, hanging with Rachthony.. We could have that again, if you'd just let us.
