I feel like every time I post something, I start with "man, it's been a while" or some such. It's like I write something that I need to say, and then I'm good for a while. But before I know it, all of the unsaid feelings and thoughts start to weaken the dam I built and eventually, I need to let it out again.

So, last time, I was single, lonely, depressed, and fat.

I did the P90x thing for a while, until the guy who I was doing it with bailed on me. One day it was a sunburn, then he was nauseous, etc. Long story short, I'm holding pretty steady between 235 and 240. I'll probably go ahead and buy P90x for myself and just do it here at the apartment. I still want to lose weight, and after actually having some results with that workout dvd, I really want to keep it up.

Still at Domino's and loving it.

Still saying eff school, cause eff school.

Here's the biggest change since the last post. I met someone.

Let me try that again. I didn't exactly meet someone. I met her in high school, when she was the girlfriend of my best friend at the time. She's been part of our little group of friends since then, but we were never particularly close. But I've been around to watch her marry one guy, get divorced from that guy, date another guy, have a baby, and, most recently, leave that guy. She was kind of in need of a shoulder to cry on, and I wanted to be there for her. And before I knew it, I fell for her and her 17 month old daughter. They turned my lonely depressing existence into a little mini family. My apartment used to be full of pizza boxes and Subway wrappers. Now it's full of little baby toys and clothes and stuff. Every single thing about who I thought I was as a person has flipped on its head.

Before we found each other, I was absolutely certain that I would never want to date anyone with a kid. I felt like I was a kid myself. I can barely figure out what I need, much less take care of a small human. So, I avoided moms like the plague. But, I spent five minutes picking this little girl up and twirling her around in the air and watching her face light up and that huge grin on her face before I realized that THIS was what my life was missing. I was missing family. I needed family.

Now, I'm not saying everything is peaches and cream. The gf and I get into squabbles here and there, like every couple, but she plops down on the couch next to me, drapes her leg over mine, and lays her head on my shoulder, and we just watch the little one play, and it's like, where else would I ever want to be right now?

So, that's what's up now. Still trying to decide on what the little one's gonna call me. I did manage to teach her the "mama mama mama mama ma ma ma ma mum mum mum mum mommy mommy mommy" thing from Family Guy. I'm gonna try to teach her to say "vile woman" or "what the deuce" or "You have the power to end this!"