Haven't done this in a while. Things have changed.

Riding solo, again. The girl and I went through a couple months of pretty bad arguments and just general not feeling good. We had reached a point where we were gonna try something new to fix things, and then the next thing I knew, she deleted me from facebook and refused to return my calls or texts. So... Yeah, that was unexpected. After two weeks of waiting for her to mail me my stuff back, since she refused to see me, I decided to drive to her and get it. She left my stuff in a box on her porch, and when I knocked on the door to get the rest of it, she sent her roommate to the door and hid in her bedroom. I know she was there. Her car was outside. Anyways, I guess Chapter Closed. I really thought I had something there. Serves me right for thinking I could actually find someone who appreciates me.

Next point of business, Drury, the college I go to, screwed me. They cancelled my student loans three fourths of the way through the semester, forcing me to pay them an ungodly amount of money that I didn't have. I asked them why and they told me it was because I wasn't taking graduate classes. And I asked why that mattered. And they said that I was a grad student. And I told them that at no point had anyone at Drury ever told me I was a graduate student. Any time I had asked my advisor or the financial aid or whatever office, they would tell me I was a Post-Baccalaureate student. Also, I DID sign up for a grad course for the semester. Drury cancelled it since so few people signed up for it. But there were NO other grad courses I could take to satisfy my requirements.Their response was basically, tough crap. So I had to quit student teaching, when I was like a month and a half away from being finished, so I could get hours back at Domino's so I could pay Drury for the class that I had to quit.

So, now I'm living in a one bedroom apartment, alone, working full time at Domino's and not going to school.

Every single thing that I had been building for my life has collapsed within the course of two months.

Sigh. Pretty pathetic, I know. So, since I lost everything from things I had zero control of, I have decided that the only way I can save myself from the massive amount of depression I feel zeroing in on me is to do something about the one part of my life that maybe I can do something about: my weight.

For any random E-People who read this without knowing who I am, I'm a 5'8, 26 year old man, with a pretty broad build. Even since I was a baby, I was a very broad shouldered kid. So, the weight that I have is distributed to the point that most people have a VERY hard time believing I weigh as much as I do.

I've started a sort of mini diet that consists of essentially not eating fried food and not drinking soda. Yeah, not very extreme changes, but I wanted to start somewhere that I thought I could actually stick to. I've also started P90x. For those of you who don't know, it's a 90 day fitness routine that comes on hour long dvds. Each day of the week is a different workout. They're.... pretty intense. But, I figure, if I stick to the no fried foods or soda, and if I stick to doing my hour of crazy intense workout each day.... I should be able to make SOME progress. At least, enough to get myself in some form of shape so that I can take things a step further.

When I began, I weighed right at 250 lbs. I'm currently down to 245. My first goal is 190. I just want to prove to myself that I CAN be under 200 lbs. I've been over for so long...

So, that's that. I'm monumentally lonely, but before I worry about trying to find the right girl, I want to try to make myself the best version of me that I can. How can I expect to be with a good looking girl if I look like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man?

Alright, that's enough wallowing in self pity for one night. Wish me luck that I can stick with the positive changes that I'm making, and that I can not dwell on the negative ones. Have a great day/night/week/month/whatever!